This is why I lose clients...
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves: Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?" ~ Marianne Williamson
This is one of my favorite quotes because it's so true. And yet it's not enough just to know you are powerful beyond measure. Plenty of people know this truth, yet their life never changes to reflect it.
The reason is, we all have inner set points.
Set points within our emotional, mental and physical bodies that tell us what is "safe" and acceptable.
These set points are created in early childhood (even before) and unconsciously create the blue print of your life. These set points determine how much discomfort and agony feels "acceptable" to you, how much challenge, pain and discomfort is "normal" for you. How much debt, loss, heartache, health challenges or disempowerment is "allowed" for you.
As you can imagine, these inner set points are extremely limiting. They limit your ability to change your life- make more money, have more nourishing relationships, align with your dharma, receive pleasure, have lasting health, step into greater empowerment and so much more.
Every time you bump up against one of these inner set points, it will push you back into your "comfort zone"- whatever feels normal to you- even if it's extremely painful and uncomfortable. These set points have been your normal for a very long time. They have been the normal for your tribe, your lineage, for even longer.
These old set points, are often vows that are taken, unconsciously, to keep you loyal to your tribe of origin. This is why they are so challenging to uproot and change.
Lasting, sustainable change requires identifying and confronting these inner set points, then transforming them and healing the vows.
But here's the biggest problem:
Just as you begin to unravel and uproot these inner set points, there's often a sabotage dynamic that kicks in to insure you don't go past your old "comfort zone".
Much of this has to do with familial and tribal vows that we have taken, trauma from repeated cycles of loss, painful rejection and past disappointments. This powerful, old subconscious programming will suck you back into your old set points very elegantly and very strategically.
Often people will attract situations, experiences, relationships and even make choices that align them with their old patterns and behaviors, just as progress, change and transformation is starting to take root.
Here's How These Set Points Look:
- Wow! Your new protocol for inner change is really starting to pay off!
Then, suddenly something happens and you can no longer afford to pay for the support and resources that have helped you. Looks like you'll have to quit getting the extra support you need.
- You've noticed your health improving and your new life style choices are really working!
You have been feeling different, better, stronger and healthier! Then you splurge on sugar and alcohol, or any other food that negatively impact you. Suddenly you've fallen off the wagon and struggle to get back on track.
- Your finances are starting to finally show improvement!
You even have more money in your savings account. Bam! You're hit with a major expenditure that forces you to dip into your extra cash. There went your safety net!
- You found something you love, and you're loving what you're doing.
The extra resources are really paying off! Finally some alignment with your passion and purpose! Then, all of a sudden, life gets busy and hectic, and you're overwhelmed! Just like that, you've forgotten your passions, resources and you even missed the class that was helping you so much.
- You now truly understand what it feels like to be in a nourishing relationship.
You fall in love with someone new, and everything seems to be better than you thought possible. Then it's revealed. This person turns out to be the same old type you've always picked, which kicks you into a downward spiral of self deprecation. Can you really trust yourself to make better choices?
- You are taking bold, powerful action steps- with clarity and purpose.
You are finally aligned with your inner truth! Then suddenly something shifts. You no longer feel aligned with your power. All of a sudden your passion no longer has the juiciness or meaning it did. You start avoiding and neglecting your resources that helped you rise and shine. What happened?
- Your spiritual path is zooming forward. You feel aligned, connected and clear.
You have felt the growth- and others have even commented that you seem different. Your practices are starting to deeply impact you from the inside out. But suddenly, something comes up. You don't have time for your practice. It's impossible to fit it in to your life and schedule right now. You step back into your stress, overwhelm and uncertainty.
Do any of these scenarios sound familiar?
If so, you're likely getting hit by an inner set point.
Just as progress and big shifts take place, you lose your momentum, get derailed and something comes along to pull you away from your progress. Sometimes this sabotage looks very innocent, or even accidental. Yet, it's vital to address the deeper, underlying issues.
Why might you be resisting powerful, life-altering change?
I see this happen a lot with my clients.
Amazing things happen in my sessions. Big changes, monumental transformation and life changing results take place, often very swiftly.
Just as soon as these big changes take place, some clients will disrupt their work with me.
It doesn't make sense! It's not rational! Why would someone resist these powerful life changing effects?
Why?! Their inner set points kick in to insure that success and sustainable change does not take place.
In many cases, these inner set points will keep someone from even taking the first step of change.
They won't ask for help, they refuse new resources or guidance. Sometimes this means they never come back for a second session. They crack the door open, but never walk through it. It's too terrifying to look.
These inner set points are so powerful they can keep a person stuck in disempowerment for an entire lifetime.
Others will create repeated cycles of success and failure, one step forward, two steps back, over and over and over again- staying stagnant indefinitely.
I am well versed in how inner set points work, how they show up, and what it looks like to be stuck in old, limiting set points. I track these set points in my self diligently, as well as in my clients.
The resources I use with my clients are powerful tools for transforming and changing old set points that keep you stuck.
Working with me means that your life is guaranteed to change- often very swiftly.
Some people are not ready for this type of lasting change. I get it.
If you are ready to transform your set points- and insure that when they kick in (they always do)- that you have the support and resources you need to keep them from sabotaging your success, let's check in.
Insuring that your old, limiting set points don't continue to sabotage your success, requires consistent support, resources and guidance in order for lasting change.
Ready to move past your inner set points this year and up-level your life?!
Let's check in for a quick chat.
Think clearly about where you want to be six months from now.
What is your vision? What does it look like and feel like to be living this vision?
What challenges and obstacles are in your way? What has sabotaged your success in the past?
If you're ready to clarify your vision and change old set points and limiting beliefs, reach out to me for a chat.
I still have some openings for free 15 minute chats this next week.
Email me to confirm a date and time: [email protected]
Looking forward to connecting!
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