This post is less about jyotish or self care resources and more of a pep talk. A reminder to all those who are sensitive, who feel deeply. Perhaps you are like me, feeling the rawness of this sacred time, the fragility of this Navaratri eclipse time. For most, the subtle messages from the feeling level are nudged aside, neglected, tucked thoughtlessly away. But for those of us who have bigger feelings, more intense feelings, we can't so easily let our feelings and emotions hide. Not to say we haven't tried (or still don't occasionally). When you give up trying to resist your depth of feeling life, this is a turning point. And this is probably where we will cross paths.... When you start to recognize that your feelings are the pulse of your life, this can offer great awakening. It's not necessarily that the feelings, or the emotions that arise from these feelings, are in and of themselves healing. But if you are awake and savvy, those feelings can be amazing resources for your transformation and healing process. Our feelings are pathways to becoming more and more awake. Awakened to our needs, wants, and the whys behind them. Feelings are always a response to our personal mythology. A reservoir of our life experiences. So if you feel deeply, you are one of the lucky ones. You have easy access to what can awaken you and bring more consciousness to your life process. We are the gifted ones, but can so easily get off track and lose our sense of inner trust, our resiliency. I know personally that great sensitivity is both a blessing and a curse and we must guard it like the precious gift that it is. Some days, like today, when the rawness of life is strong and tears are unstoppable, I remind myself that I am here in this body to feel. That is why I chose to be a human I believe- to feel the full range of my humanness. Not just the good, the easy, the light and joyful parts. But also the dark, vulnerable, fearful and tragic parts as well. And though I know this dance between the hard and the soft is a choice, a very conscious one, I choose to work with both very intentionally. We are both light and dark. (And Jyotish is the study of this which is why I use it). Those of us who are sensitive know how thin this veil is between these realms and just how overwhelming that seems at times. Consider this as your reminder to keep going. Even when it's hard to take another step. Don't lose hope that life will bring another day, another dawn. Surf your waves and find a shore, but be ready to surf again. Bring presence to your breath and to the soft landing that is your physical body; its sensations will help you land back in the now. Remind yourself how sacred your internal and external space is. Keep company that is nourishing to you and find environments that do the same. When the darkness arrives, thank it, work with it, let it share its messages. Then use great care to peel back the layers of your truth. Above all, when you're walking through fire, the best rule is always to keep walking. Continue feeling, but keep the feelings moving. Treat your sensitivity, your ability to feel, as the gift that it is, and it will bless you with its many offerings. Here is to your embodied movement forward- with grace, care, and presence to your own sacred existence. Attending to your sacredness is the ultimate self care. Nourish yourself! Did you catch my *free* class Ultimate Self Care for Sensitive Types? You can still listen to it until April 4th. I've also just re-launched my Be Your Gift class series for those seeking deeper support for their sensitivity. Sign up to hear the replay. My Jyotish Basics Classes have begun! Don't miss out on these transformational and healing classes. Registration for April classes closes March 29th! Sign up for details.
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I realized due to the overwhelming response I received from my How to Love a Scorpio article both on my website and on Elephant Journal, that many people identify with my Scorpio Moon torments- whether they are truly a Scorpio or not. Scorpio Moon epitomizes the sensitivity within, heightens the emotional body, and also the intuitive awareness- if used properly. But you don't have to be Scorpio or have Scorpio Moon to be extra sensitive. In fact there are many ways this can show up in one's personal jyotish chart.
There are a lot of us who have been challenged by this type of extra sensitivity, heightened inner awareness, and extra level of emotion; it is a normal, default setting for us. This sensitivity in many ways can be painful, feel like a burden, and even be a challenging disaster in our lives! It can also be an extraordinary gift and a powerful source of awareness, but only if it is cultivated, nurtured and treated as the gift that it is. You may or may not have been working with your innate sensitivity consciously. You may or may not know all the common labels out there. A few that I'm aware of are HSP (highly sensitive person), introvert, overly emotional and even just shy. A recent Huffington Post article shares 16 Habits of the Highly Sensitive Type. Some of it makes sense to me, but other parts feel a bit too generalized or irrelevant for me personally. What is interesting to me however, is the fact that this "sensitive" type is being recognized more and more by the mainstream. That I think is a positive thing and something to embrace. I used to really resent my sensitivity and I denied it- especially to my self. It certainly wasn't a recognized attribute that I should give a big, warm welcome to as I was growing up- navigating school, relationships, family members and societal standards and norms. I learned pretty quickly that sensitivity was not a recipe for my success in life, so I must suppress and negate it. God forbid I cry, express my hurts and pains! This would amount to being vulnerable, easily attacked or scape-goated (which happened far too many times unfortunately). So I suppressed and continued to negate my feelings; the felt senses. Not surprisingly I felt angry- a lot! My anger took me on some very twisted and rocky roads and to this day continues to rage on as I slowly unpack, piece by piece, the hurts and pains and traumas of the past. It will take some time, but I accept my anger now- in a way that I couldn't fathom before. The anger vacillated with deep, dark, and deathly bouts of depression. The kind that made me want to die, give up on life and put me out of the misery I felt in this life. Waves of depression have been common for me (which I now know is a result of emotional suppression and negation). Did I know I was doing this? Of course not! But no one ever taught me to be friends with my emotions, to invite them into my life. Up until the past few years, I had only learned that emotions were uncomfortable, hard to handle, unpleasant to look at or listen to, and I should turn them down, off, or pretend they weren't there. This emotional suppression and negation has cost me dearly. It has taken me on many sad, miserable and lonely paths of pain and darkness. Alcohol and drugs (society's favorite emotional suppression/negation tricks!) were one of my sad and miserable paths and it marked a large part of my younger years. It numbed the mountains of pains within me, but they were still there, growing bigger and grander, looming in the distance. Mountains I would have to cross at some point. Mountains I am still crossing. It was meditation that finally helped me kick the drugs and alcohol. The light intensified within me and returning to my Transcendental Meditation practice opened many closed doors and pushed me towards my own light. I was so grateful for this tool! But meditation isn't a cure as I found out. Actually, I've found out that nothing is a "cure". When we open our eyes after meditation, we still have to deal with ourselves- all of ourselves- even the parts we don't want to see or have others see. After meditation, I still had my emotions and I still didn't know what to do with them- and they still made me uncomfortable and miserable. At times I even felt wrong or bad for having these emotions as though I wasn't "enlightened" enough. I often wondered what was wrong with me. Shouldn't I be feeling more bliss more of the time? Shouldn't all this meditation be the cure? But it wasn't. When I finally found body-centered expressive art therapy at the Tamalpa Institute, I started to unravel the whole picture a bit more. Oh! We have all these parts, and we must use all these parts! (There truly are no spare parts in the universe- especially not in the microcosmic universe within.) We must not negate all these parts or pretend they aren't here! We must work with all our colors, textures and fibers, and weave our own, unique tapestry. And, as it turns out, the emotions are a big part of this beautiful tapestry of life. They are an intimate part of our inner landscape and must be cherished, treated with respect for the insightful messages they offer, and invited into our lives with open arms. This is when my life started to truly shift and my gifts started to develop. The gift of being sensitive. Yes, sensitivity is a gift. The emotional body is closely linked to our intuition. This is our internal guidance system that will never lead us astray or give false messages. But most of us are not hearing its memos at all and we are mostly getting the emotional/intuitive messages mixed up with our mental/mind messages. The mind isn't very trust worthy, it's basically a tape on repeat and it likes to go over and over and over the same old ground. Not very interesting actually- although it likes to make things interesting with all its stories! Sensitive people are those of us who are gifted with a heightened emotional body awareness. This is a gift- if we know how to work with it. If we don't, it is complete misery. Unfortunately, in our society, it is a curse. That is why treating our emotional body and our sensitivity with extra TLC is so important. If we are truly wanting to harvest the gifts of this offering, then we must treat it with tender loving care. We must treat it as the gift that it is, and we must treat ourselves as the gift that we are. I found that as soon as I began to treat myself as special, and nurture myself with special care, life began to shift for me. I won't lie, it has taken some dramatic and challenging life changes, very different choices and actions than the past, and has also presented some very painful letting go as well. But, what has opened up as a result, is a deep awakening of what this gift of sensitivity can truly offer me- and others. My sensitivity continues to blossom, the more I nurture it. There are many things that, as a sensitive person, you must do differently than others. It is not an easy path, but it is a special path. You must guard this sensitivity as if it is priceless. It is, and so are you! Take baby steps to embrace your gift of sensitivity, and take a leap towards awakening your most precious gift. It can lead you to many destinations you would not otherwise venture towards. It can open you to your dharma, your life path, to relationships and kindred spirits that you would otherwise miss or overlook. Your sensitivity can lead you to the tools that will offer support and guidance to other beings. Treating your sensitivity like a precious gem, like the treasure that it is, can lead you to your dreams and help you awaken them. Here are some tips for treating your sensitivity with tenderness: 1) The company you keep is vital to your well being. As a sensitive type, you easily merge with others' energy and suddenly get lost in it. Wait, who's energy is this? Mine? Or theirs? Spending time with the wrong types of people is the fastest way to derail yourself. Remember, you are special and you are a gift, treat your self like you are and only spend time with people who see you as a treasure and see themselves as such. And yes, this may mean spending much of your time alone. That is actually important as well. 2) Self care is a top priority. You can't get away with trashing your body like many other people. You will fall a part faster. A little goes a long way with you in other words. You can not look to others and think you can follow what they are doing. You will likely not be doing what anyone else is doing! Which includes no toxic and processed foods; dead food, makes you feel dead. Lively and fresh foods, keep you lively, awake and fresh. Coffee, chocolate, caffeine and alcohol should be avoided and used only with caution- ie very consciously. Following ayurvedic guidelines for sleep, eating, and overall well being is really the ideal. 3) Boundaries are another top priority. Because we are so porous and easily take on, merge with, and absorb energy, we have to protect ourselves. Healthy boundaries are a wonderful tool on many levels. The more you work with them, the clearer and cleaner life becomes. Toxicity in your life is minimized and your energy isn't drained as easily. This leads to trusting your self more and more which is really a win/win for overall confidence and self acceptance. I am big on boundaries and the more I work with them, the more I see the value in them- in all areas of my life. 4) Surround yourself with beauty and upliftment. We often overlook this one. I think it is enough to know that there is massive suffering in the world, but that doesn't mean I need to watch it on the news or read it in the paper 24/7. In fact, if you are a sensitive type, a little goes a very long way. A one sentence headline might be overwhelming, or even a trip to the grocery store! Again, protect and nurture your gift of sensitivity. Don't make your self wrong for not reading the paper, watching news, or dwelling on the suffering of the masses. In order to be present and use your sensitivity as a gift, you will have to be very awake to what is going on within you, without distraction. This is a full time job! Your sensitivity will lead you to giving back to society. Trust the process. Also, make sure there is ample beauty in your daily life. Flowers, scents, music- let your senses be pleasured. These little pleasures can make all the difference. 5) Move your body and listen deeply. There are different types of movement for different purposes. Each will get you different results. Rule number one: move your body. Walk, ride your bike, dance, do yoga. Do something that awakens the body and gets prana flowing. This is a basic requirement daily. Then there is somatic movement- a very gentle approach that quiets the body and lets you check into the subtle messages that are occurring within. Somatic movement practice (like Anna Halprin's Movement Ritual) has changed my life. At this point in my physical movement process, it's the slower and the more subtle movements that I'm mostly interested in for self development; movement that helps me listen more carefully to my body's messages. There is still a time and place for other types of movement, but don't neglect the slow and gentle kind. 6) Connect with Nature. As a sensitive type, we are very intimately connected to nature in a way that others probably aren't. That means we need to sync up with her rhythms daily for optimum effects. Hug trees, walk barefoot, open the windows, take deep breaths of fresh air, spend ample time in nature and touch the earth. Nature is your re-charge button. It's the fastest, simplest solution to re-centering. Also, don't neglect the impact animals have on you and your internal balance. Pet, hug, love on your animal companions! They are your best friends and will teach you so much about your animal body and help you recharge in the process. 7) Sync up with the Moon. The more jyotish charts I study, the more I see the impact of the Moon on our level of sensitivity and our experience of life. The Moon and its ebbs and flows, waxes and wanes, as well as the nakshatras that it passes through daily, are the most profound tool of guidance and wisdom for those of us who are extra sensitive. Track the Moon. Notice what its effects are on you when it is full vs. empty. Use my 2015 Moon Wisdom Calendar to start a more intimate dance with the Moon and its effects. 8) Creativity and the Arts can be a life saving tool. Use the arts as a process of harvesting, listening, cultivating awareness and depth for your journey. Art is a profound messenger. It brings out what is inside of us so that we can see it visually. All our inner material becomes tangible. Our emotional, mental and physical messages can be harvested with this one universal language- art. If used in a therapeutic way, a way of listening deeply, art can be the gateway into all the mysteries within us and all the answers we are seeking about our journey. In my jyotish work, I'm bridging the messages of the cosmos with a body-centered expressive art therapy process. My workshops are a great place to start. Use my MP3's as a guided resource for this unique blend of tools. 9) As a sensitive person, the emotional body is paramount. As I mentioned above, the emotional body is our link to the intuition. If we want to connect more with this profound tool of insight hardwired within us, then we have to work with the emotional body in a way that helps us clarifies our relationship with it. I am so passionate about the emotional body and helping others listen to their own emotional body wisdom, I've developed the majority of my jyotish and body-centered expressive art therapy work around it. I know that the majority of people on the planet are completely unaware of the important role our emotions play in our life experience, and how it can be a tool of guidance rather than suffering. I also know that many people are like me, extremely emotionally sensitive, and are seeking answers. My work is for you! Make sure you start with a 3 level check in as a way to start your clarity process. Use your sensitivity and harvest your gifts! If you truly take care of and cultivate this sensitivity within you, it can lead to many deep awakenings and become a truly valuable life long gift. This gift can awaken the intuition and lead to realizing your life purpose. Your life purpose can be dharmic and serve your self and others in profound ways. I'll talk more about that in an upcoming article. But for now, honor your sensitivity. Trust it to be a useful tool of guidance and awareness. Cultivate care and patience with it. Make changes in your life that will nurture and support this gift of sensitivity. And don't worry, I've got more to share with you in order to help you with this process! Details coming soon! Did you catch my *free* class Ultimate Self Care for Sensitive Types? You can still listen to it until April 4th. I've also just re-launched my Be Your Gift class series for those seeking deeper support for their sensitivity. Sign up to hear the replay. Need some extra guidance and clarity? Schedule a session with me. Plan your week in tune with nature. Never miss a planetary update. Sign up for my weekly newsletter. Befriending Your Emotions: It's Vital for Your Health. Many of you know that I'm passionate about the Moon and all things Moon related. The Moon and its experience within one's jyotish chart says a lot about the individual human experience. An unhappy Moon can spoil the fruits of a chart or at least make it feel miserable regardless of the bounty. The nature of our natal Moon and its experience with the other planets is so fundamental to our life experience that I devote an entire column to it weekly. The Moon is a powerful resource for us and can be a tool for self growth, awareness and spiritual development. Read more about the Moon from a Jyotish perspective and why it is so revered. Unfortunately, the more I learn about the Moon and its purpose- within the cosmos and within our own beings- the more I realize how ignorant the majority of humans are about this awesome inner guidance system we have hardwired into us. As a result, the emotions are one of these "Moon topics" that are the basis of my work. I'm passionate about the emotions because I have found that most people are completely "dumb" when it comes to navigating their own emotions. In fact, our society is almost entirely clueless about this very real and important human function. Most people would like to skip the "feeling" parts of life all together and bypass this very important tool of inner wisdom. There are however very real and unfortunate consequences to skipping over the emotions. Cultivating a relationship with our emotions can help enrich our lives on so many basic levels. Cultivating more awareness with our emotions can enhance our personal and interpersonal relationships as well as cultivate increased creativity, greater harmony and joy. The human body has a fairly predictable response system in it. When we first have an emotional response it usually only lasts a few moments. Then the mental body attaches to the emotion and keeps it on constant re-play, looping it over and over in our minds. Finally, there is a physical response as a result. This three part process is either happening quickly or we are repeating this cycle over many many years until a very old "story" develops. When an emotion has made its way into a physical body response, we know it is quite engrained in our story or personal mythology at that point. This is why the body can be a wonderful resource for emotional wisdom as well Ideally, we would have a relationship with the emotions that provides us the information we need and the awareness we need in order to make very informed action steps in our lives; before the mind attaches to them and they settle into the physical body. Once the emotion settles into the body, health issues can arise. So clearly the emotions are step number one in prevention. When we skip over the emotions and the consistent work that it takes to create a relationship with our emotions then we bypass the most basic tool within us that is hard wired for our satisfaction and listening in our lives. Do you have a healthy relationship with your emotions? Here are some questions to ask your self about your relationship with your emotions: -Do you pause to listen to your emotions, to check in with what arrives and then use this to inform your actions and choices? -Can you be present (very present) to others' emotions and navigate which are "theirs" and which are "yours"? - Do you dump your emotions on others as a way to cope with your own overwhelm? -Do you hate tears? Anger? Do you wish it could be happy and "smooth" all the time for your Self and your relationships? -Do you push past your own emotions, trying to skip to the "good stuff"? -Do you cut and paste over your feelings- especially around others- in order to keep things "tidy" and not rock the boat? -Do you allow time and space for discomfort and emotions like sadness, anger, depression, grief and loneliness? -Do you use drugs or alcohol, food and other "feel good" methods to enhance your life? Especially when life feels tough? These are valuable questions to ask yourself in order to determine what your relationship is with your emotions and the Emotional Body. It is in fact a whole body in and of itself and its very worthy of your time, attention and intention. Unfortunately, the majority of us are ill-equipped to handle the range of emotions that a human is capable of experiencing. Most of us are conditioned from very early stages of life that certain emotions are "good" and other emotions are "bad". Certain emotions will get a "good" response from our parents and our environment and certain emotions will get us a "bad" response. We may learn to shut down our capacity to feel the full range of our life experiences as a result. We may begin to make choices (over and over and over again) that continue to perpetuate unfortunate circumstances and feelings within our life as well. This early conditioning requires some essential re-patterning, but the good news is that a simple technique called the 3 Level Check-in can be a helpful first step in finding a more conscious relationship with our emotions. We can then move forward in life with greater awareness about life choices, actions and our own personal embodiment. It is a practice, and as they say, practice makes perfect. So use the 3 level check-in to help you flex your emotional muscles so to speak. A three level check in is easy, fast and helps us separate the three bodies- emotional body, mental body, and physical body- so that we can easily identify what their messages are. Interestingly, most people are constantly confusing the mental and emotional bodies. Many of my clients can not even find their emotional bodies because the mental body is overriding it and has been for so long! The mental body wants to take the wheel and keep driving you. And drive it does! On and on and on. To the point of, most people do not even know what is the mind and what are the emotions! They are very different and have very different needs, so making sure that we make room for the emotions and cultivating a relationship with them is really step number one. Here are some ways life improves once we start working with the emotional body more directly: We know what we need and what we don't need in our lives. We know what feels emotionally supportive and we make choices and take action accordingly. We create more healthy boundaries within our lives and our relationships. We have more space in our lives for joy and inspiration. We have more satisfying and wholesome relationships- with ourselves and with others. The results are a directly related to being very acutely aware of our emotional body, what it is telling us, what it needs for nourishment and support, as well as what it doesn't need. If we don't know what it needs, we can't give it what it needs. It's quite simple. Use these three simple steps to help you develop a deeper relationship with your emotions: Step #1: Use the three level check in. Try to create a practice of "checking in" at least once a day but especially when there is a strong emotional response happening within you. Step #2: Tracking themes and patterns that develop within your emotional/mental bodies and noticing how these show up in your physical body. Can you feel your stomach tense up when you feel angry? Does your spine hurt when you feel lack of support or encouragement in your life? Do you get a headache when overwhelm sets in? Step #3: Use your three level check in as the impetus for your creative arts process in order to harvest more information directly. Are you ready for more resources? Listen to my free class: Ultimate Self Care for Sensitive Types. *Photo credit to Taira Restar Need some extra guidance and clarity? Schedule a session with me. Plan your week in tune with nature. Never miss a planetary update. 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